Wednesday, 14 August 2013

Next!

I was just thinking today - no wonder I'm exhausted.  I took a half-finished story and pushed, pulled, finished, and edited it (3 times) within 10 weeks.  Yeesh!  As much as I'm super-proud of it, it did come at a price.  My poor family - I've basically been coming home from the day job and locking myself in my studio.  Thank goodness they realised it was only a short-term thing!

These past few days have been spent catching up on family time and sleep, and I'm just about feeling "normal" again.  My body clock is slowly righting itself after all those 2am bedtimes, and I no longer have to wear a name tag to remind my family of who I am.  Things are looking up!

So, what's next, you might ask?  Well, I finished a story a couple of years ago that I'm keen to revamp and edit into my next release.  I've been thinking about it for the past few days, and I made a momentous decision regarding the format of it today: I'm going to split it into three parts.  Not three books, but three parts.

You see, the story takes place over three days - an anniversary get-together by a group of friends - and over three years.  So, I've decided to write those three days in each part, one part per year.  Hopefully this will work!  I'm hoping this brings about the character progression that I think this story needs.  You see, the subject matter is not a light one: suicide.

The story is titled "Anniversary" and here is the synopsis for you:


Danny was larger than life - right up until he shot himself.

Each year, his friends mark the anniversary of his death by meeting at the beach house owned by Danny's family.  Together, they relive the memories, both good and bad, and try to deal with the questions that his suicide inevitably left them with.  Why didn't he tell anyone what he was planning?  Why did he do it?  

Danny's girlfriend, Kate, blames herself.  She should have known - shouldn't she?  Max was the one who found him that day, and what he saw has altered his entire future.  His best friend Finn is tired of watching everyone tear themselves apart over what went wrong, but you can't speak ill of the dead - can you?  

Told over the course of three years, and three weekends, we see the effect that Danny's decision has had on everyone he loves.  It may have seemed like the easy way out for Danny, but there is no doubt about the devastation he left behind.  

Friendship.  The word itself conjures up images of camaraderie, of trust, of love.  But what happens when that trust is broken and when that love is thrown back in your face?


Over the next few weeks, I intend on beginning the editing process (once the other parts of my life are back in kilter!).  I'm aiming to finish in 2014 and will look at publication options then.  In the meantime, I'm hoping to be able to share some snippets and teasers with you!

Thanks for all your support thus far - I can't wait to share "Absolution" with you all, and hopefully "Anniversary" too!  If you have any comments, I'd love to hear them - either here on my blog, or over on my Facebook page.


~Amanda

Thursday, 8 August 2013

"Absolution" - The Prologue

The very fact that I'm writing this post means that I have 300 likers/fans on my Facebook page - woot!  Thank you all, I'm so glad you joined me on this journey!  I love hearing your comments and having that interaction with you.

So, as promised, here is the prologue for "Absolution", in it's entirety.  I'd love to hear any comments or feedback you have - either by leaving a comment here on my blog (below) or by popping back to my Facebook page and telling me there.



Absolution

By Amanda Dick


Prologue

“You cannot find peace by avoiding life.”
~ Virginia Woolf

“Eddie Vedder is a god.” Ally announced from the back seat.  “No doubt about it.”
Jack nodded at her in the rear-view mirror.  “No arguments from me.”
“I’d go along with that.” Callum agreed.
“And not only is he a god, but he has to be one of the sexiest men on the planet.” she continued.
“Good save.” Jack winked. 
“He’s the guy that chicks want, and guys want to be like.” Callum smirked.  “But I don’t blame you - if I was a chick, I’d do him.”
“Ugh.” Ally screwed up her face.  “Now I need bleach to scrub that mental image from my brain.”
“You’re welcome.”
Ally leaned forward between the seats.  “Okay – favorite song from the concert tonight.”
Jack pulled a face, thinking, his eyes on the road ahead. 
“’Jeremy’.” he decided finally.
“’Crown of Thorns’.” Callum said.  “I never got to see Mother Love Bone live so it’s the next best thing.  Although ‘Why Go’ was pretty freakin’ amazing.”
He broke into a frenzied air guitar session in the front seat, his expression rapturous.   
Jack chuckled as Callum turned back to Ally.  “Yours?”
“’Black’.” she said, without hesitation.  “With ‘Release’ a close second.”  She held up the camera, grinning.  “And I got it all on video.  Can’t wait to get home and upload it.”
Jack smiled as she screwed up her face and squealed happily, leaning back again.
“I cannot believe it’s taken so long to see them live, but tonight was worth the wait.”
“Definitely.”
“He has the sexiest voice – ever.” she sighed.
“Hello?” Callum turned around in the seat, throwing his hands up.  “Do we have to spend the entire trip home hearing about how sexy he is?  I’m sure that, given half a chance, he’d prefer to be known for his talent than his looks or his…general sexiness.”
“Jealous?” Ally asked cheekily.
“When I have all this at my fingertips?” he smirked, running his hand through his hair haughtily.  “Not a chance.  And come on - he may be sexy, and he may be a rock god, but I’m sure it’s not fun and games all the time.  I mean, he probably has those paparazzi bottom-feeders chasing him all over the world, splashing his visit to the pharmacy to buy haemorrhoid cream all over the front page – that’s gotta suck, for sure.”
Ally leaned forward from the back seat to swat him hard around the head.
“Don’t you dare drag him down to mortal level like that!” she laughed.  “I’m sure he has people to do all that stuff for him.”
“True.  He probably has people to apply the cream for him, too.”
Ally leaned forward to slap him again but he ducked out of the way at the last minute, catching a slight cuff to the ear instead.
“Quit it, you two.  Don’t make me the grown-up here.” Jack warned, grinning as he anticipated the approaching corner, taking his foot off the gas slightly. 
The road was still wet, even if the rain had stopped.  The country road had been lined with trees for the past half mile, trapping the light from the headlights, bouncing it off the undergrowth and back out onto the road again.  The effect was slightly eerie and he was grateful when the trees gave way to the open countryside again. 
“She’s vicious!” Callum insisted, rubbing his head vigorously.  “You oughtta put a leash on her.”
“Turn the music up will you?  Can’t hear it over the whiny bitching in here.”
Jack glanced at her in the rear-view mirror and she smiled back, winking wickedly.  She was in a playful mood tonight, still on a high from the concert.  He could relate - his ears were still buzzing and adrenaline hummed through his veins.  It had been worth the long drive there and back but he suddenly wished they were home already.  The ring that was tucked safely into the pocket of his jeans dug into him as a physical reminder of what lay ahead.  But first, they had to drop Callum off at his place. 
Distracting himself, he leaned over to turn the music up and Eddie Vedder’s sultry voice filled the car.  Ally swayed to the music in the back seat, eyes closed, satisfied smile on her face.  He turned his attention back to the road as they rounded the corner.  Headlights cut through the dark, directly into their path, and his heart leapt into his throat.  He knew instinctively what was about to happen mere seconds before the car hit them. 
Callum yelled something as he automatically wrenched the steering wheel away from the blinding light.  It all happened so fast, he didn’t even have time to slam on the brakes.  The impact was mind-blowing, sending a shuddering jolt throughout his entire body that seemed to shake his bones loose, turning his limbs to jelly.  Time stopped as they skidded across the road, the buzzing in his ears blocking everything else out momentarily.  Then they were upside down and plunged into darkness.  He squinted out through the windshield at a sea of dark green and black, his brain struggling to process what was happening, trying to prepare himself even though a part of him knew there was no preparing for any of this.  His fate was completely out of his hands.  He felt like he was moving simultaneously in slow-motion and fast-forward and it crossed his mind that this might be how he died.  A strange calmness washed over him as he waited for his life to flash before his eyes.
The car suddenly bounced as it left the road, ripping through a fence, the trees ahead rapidly filling the windscreen as he mentally braced himself for the impact.  He was being tossed around like a rag doll and the crazy rollercoaster ride ended as abruptly as it had begun, jolting him again, throwing a spear of pain through his shoulder and neck that momentarily left him breathless. 
And then there was silence.  Buzzing, humming, vibrating silence. 

Don't forget - "Absolution" comes out in ebook format via Amazon and Barnes & Noble in October 2013 - print run to follow.
  



~ Amanda

Friday, 19 July 2013

Another Week, Another Teaser

I really didn't expect that quick a response to my last Facebook page post - thanks everyone!  To reward you all, here's a teaser from chapter 6 of "Absolution" for you.  It's so hard to choose these teasers, believe me - I don't want to give anything away, so it seems safer to share them from the first few chapters of the book, as it gets mighty complicated from there on in.  Don't want to spoil any surprises!  

For those following the progress, I'm currently writing chapter 24.  After that, I have 3 more chapters to write, then a final edit to do before getting it off to my publisher by August 16th.  It's all go around here!

Anyway, the teaser:

“Ally, you need to face facts here.”  Callum eyeballed her.  “He left four years ago and he only came back for the funeral.  Does he feel guilty about that?  Sure, why not.  But did he even try to call you or me or anyone apart from Tom in the past four years?  Did he make any effort at all to come home during that time?  No, because he didn’t give a shit.  That’s the sort of guy he is.  I know it hurts like hell, but it’s the truth.  Don’t go getting suckered into this whole routine he’s got going here.  I don’t know about you, but I’m all out of second chances.”
She opened her mouth to speak but he cut her off. 
“I know you want to believe something else, and that’s your call.  Just don’t go doing anything rash because you think you see something in him that wasn’t there before.  He’s a whole different person now – none of us know him anymore, including you.”
She swallowed back tears and waited until she could control her voice before she spoke. 
“I know how you feel about him.” she said quietly.  “I know it hurt when –“
“Hey, this isn’t about me, it’s about you.”
“No, it’s not.  It’s not just about me – I wasn’t the only one he left behind.” she insisted.
“Yeah, well, you were the only one he left behind in the ICU.”
She stared at him, clamping her jaw together to keep from crying again. 
He sighed, running a hand down his face again.  “I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean it to come out like that.” 
She shrugged, frightened by the underlying anger in his tone.  “It’s okay. You’re right.”
She stared down at her hands in her lap.  He was right, she couldn’t argue with that.  Still, she knew there was more to it.

As usual, feedback is always very gratefully received - you're welcome to either comment here or on my Facebook page, I don't mind which (it's just great to hear from you!).  In case you missed the news on my Facebook page, release date has now been rescheduled for October 22nd, so watch this space!  

~Amanda

Tuesday, 9 July 2013

Teaser Time!

It's been awhile since I posted a teaser for "Absolution" so here's one for you:

“You want to know if I told her about what happened that night.”
Callum glared at him, and Jack could tell he was on the right track.
“The answer is no, I didn’t.  But why the hell didn’t you?  You were there, you knew.”
“Because it wasn’t my place to tell her – it was yours!” Callum snapped.
“Jesus, Callum!  You just let her think God knows what, all this time?”
“What the hell do you care what she thought!  You weren’t here, remember?  You didn’t have to pick up the pieces – we did!  I made a decision not to tell her because what the hell would be the point?”
“What would be the point?” Jack repeated indignantly.  “She would have known!
“Known what?  That you were a coward?  That you left because you were scared?  She knew that already!”
Jack opened his mouth to speak, but Callum cut him off.
“Don’t you dare come back here and start blaming anyone else for what you did – you did it yourself, you left!” Callum hissed, eyes blazing.  “You did the wrong thing then and by coming back now and stirring it all up again you’re just making everything worse.  Why don’t you just get the hell out of here?”
“I’m trying to make it right!” Jack insisted feebly, heart racing.
"And how in the hell do you think you’re gonna do that?”
Jack stared at him dumbfounded, knowing that he had asked himself that question a million times and come up empty.
“She doesn’t need you anymore.  The best thing you can do now is just crawl back into whatever deep, dark hole you crawled out of and let her get on with her life.”
Jack shook his head determinedly, his heart pounding.  “No.  I’m not going anywhere, not this time.”
Callum laughed scornfully.  “That’s your master plan?  Seriously?”
Jack glared at him in silence, his anger mounting.
“Oh come on – you gotta admit, that’s a reckless statement, especially for you.” Callum snorted derisively.  “You disappear when the going gets tough, remember?”
Jack clenched his teeth so tight his jaw ached.  “That’s not what happened and you know it.”
Callum threw his hands in the air, his eyes burning hot with rage.  “Do I?  Because that’s what it looked like from where I was standing!”
“You know damn well why I left!” Jack blurted out, his voice thunderous and desperate.  “You knew what I did – you were there!”
“Yeah, I knew what you did - big deal!  You were trying to save her life - she wouldn’t have blamed you!” he said hotly.  “You did the wrong thing, Jack – you should’ve stayed.”


If you're shy about leaving a comment below, you can always pop on over to my Facebook page and let me know whether or not you enjoyed the read.  It's always great to get feedback :)

~Amanda

Monday, 17 June 2013

The Road So Far

(My fellow "Supernatural" fans will appreciate the title of this post, but come on...it fits, I had to use it!).

Anyhoo...

This is another one of those "glimpse behind the curtain" posts.  Sorry.  Had to be done.

This past week has been a total nightmare for me.  I've been in week three of fighting off a head-cold, the kids have had stuff going on, I've had stuff going on, the hubby's had stuff going on, work never ends, it's been chaotic to say the least...and yet, the show must go on right?  As it happens, the show went on (for awhile at least) to the detriment of my sleep.  Then I just got so tired, the show stopped altogether and I got into a real funk about it.  I took a few nights off, to catch up on said sleep, and hoped I'd be able to throw myself back into things.  Which sorta did and didn't work...well, it didn't work out the way I planned it, anyway.

So here's the thing.  I have written possibly about 10 maybe even 12 drafts of this story.  In each version, the story changes somewhat (a good thing, I hope - certainly seems a natural progression, as I get to know the characters better each time).  But with the current draft I'm working with, the first 15 chapters were written already and I just needed to edit them.  So I did, which inevitably changed them...yet again...and we're onto draft 13 now (or some such thing - gah!).

And then I fell into that trap that I suspect most writers do at one time or another: I tried to edit as I was writing.  Now this is just silly, for lots of reasons.  Firstly, when you write, you really need to throw caution to the wind and get the gear onto the paper (or the screen).  The editing process SHOULD BE seperate from this.  Otherwise, you get to that stage where you just can't go forward because you're too busy looking back.  So that's what happened to me - I got stuck.  And because this story has changed soooooo much during the past few months, I had no clue where I was going with it.

So how did I fix that?  Well, I took some time out. I caught up on some sleep.  I tried to get myself well, so I could concentrate better.  And - one of the best moves yet - I actually ALLOWED myself a few nights off, just to mull things over.  I ended up spending a couple of hours last night, writing up draft chapters with the key issues in each, so that I had a purpose.  I now know where everything fits into the second half of the story.  I have a direction.  I know what happens next, right up to the end of the book - and (now this is a big one for me) I know how it ends.

That may sound stupid, but I write for fun.  Sometimes I don't know how it's going to end, because I get so caught up in telling the story that I personally don't care (this is why editing is so important - you get to laugh at yourself and use the delete button and say "Yeah, I don't think so..." alot).  So important.

So what happens next? Well, I get to flesh out each chapter, according to my plan.  I don't have to stick to my plan rigidly (and probably won't, as inspiration strikes), but at least each chapter has a direction now.  Hopefully, that will make the editing process that much easier.

And what chapter am I currently up to?  That would be chapter 20.  At last.  Yay!  How many are left?  I think around 10, maybe less.  So technically, I'm over halfway there.  And it feels good.

Oh - I keep meaning to mention this.  Just so you know, the publisher has only seen the first 4 chapters and the synopsis.  They signed me on that basis, knowing that only the first 15 chapters were complete.  So really, you are all sharing this journey with me, as I edit and write and tear my hair out and rejoice and cry and basically throw everything I have into this book...and then some.

So welcome to the merry-go-round - thanks for riding with me :-)

~Amanda


Tuesday, 11 June 2013

New cover for "Absolution"!

If you've been following my Facebook page, you'll have probably seen this already, but if not...here is the official cover for "Absolution".  Make sure you click on the pic to see the larger version!

Big thanks to Laura Gordon for the cover art!


I've also shared two snippets from "Absolution" on my Facebook page now - if you've seen them, I hope you enjoyed them :-)

~Amanda 

Attributions: Cover Art and Design by Laura Gordon (www.bookcovermachine.wordpress.com), Male Cover Model: Jason Aaron Baca (jasonaaronbaca.deviantart.com), Male Model Photography: Portia Shao (www.positivevista.com), Female Cover Model © Jochen Schonfeld/Fotolia.com.

Saturday, 1 June 2013

My "Process" (or "How this whole writing thing seems to work for me")

Danielle asked me about the title of this post on my FB page and to be honest, it wasn't one of those questions that I really thought might be interesting.  But maybe it is, so I'll try my best to explain it.

I'm sure this works differently for every writer, but for me, ideas come in pieces.  Usually it's kicked off by something I'm reading, watching, doing, discussing.  I "see" something (or "hear" something).  It's normally masquerading as something banal or fleeting.  A phrase.  A concept.  A song lyric. A question.  Literally anything can become a story.

I don't think it's any secret (now that I've splashed it all over the newspaper and my blog!) that the original question that kicked off "Absolution" was: "What if you felt so guilty about something, you ran away?".

That one simple idea can clearly have a lot of meanings.  For me though, it became an interesting question about human nature.  What would make someone run away from everyone they knew and loved?  It'd have to be something big.  Something life-changing.  Something that couldn't be fixed by "I'm sorry".

From there, the story began to grow.  Plot points rose up.  Characters introduced themselves.  Friends, family, relationships, places, events.  All these things showed themselves slowly, almost of their own accord (because I don't actually remember making any conscious decisions about any of these things).  Interesting, now that I look back on it.  Remember, the initial idea came to me about four years ago.  I note all these things down - characters, points of view, plot lines.  I come back to them later, changing as I go.

A lot of the time, I'll dream up a conversation or event for the story in my head.  I'll spend a few hours writing it out in a basic form, trying to remind myself what I'm trying to achieve for later.  Then, when the time is right, I'll cut and paste that conversation or event into the story, altering it as needed.  Some conversations or events never make it into the final cut, but for me it's all about exploring the ideas.  Creativity is addictive and it's all about keeping those lines open.

I don't dream, as a rule.  The only dreams I can remember are nightmares (most unpleasant, usually involving me running or hiding from nasty people.  Ugh).  Regular dreams - even crazy ones - I haven't had for years.  I think maybe, as I'm a nightowl and do all my best work at night time, I just go to bed so exhausted, I don't have the energy to dream. 

But going back to Danielle's question...once I have the basics in my head, the rest is pure and simple: hard work.  I work at telling that story.   

The first draft of a story involves the one idea that I had wanted to explore.  I'm desperate to get it out of my head and onto the screen (in that I write on my laptop).  I then refine that in the second draft.  By the third draft, I'm bored.  I need more.  This means I need to ADD more to the story, because I figure if I'm bored, so will the reader be.  So I try to think outside the square and figure out what needs to be added to make it a rounder story.  Does it need to be grittier?  Do relationships need to be explored more deeply?  Do I need another character or another angle?  There are lots of variations, and in drafts four and five, these things are added.  By the sixth or seventh draft, I'm usually happy.  Now it's time to refine the story.  Edit after edit after edit...

Throughout this whole process, the characters are becoming more and more real to me.  I can literally SEE them in my head.  Towards the end of the final draft, the story is more or less writing itself because the characters are so familiar to me.  I could tell you how each would react in any given situation, just as if they were real people.  Because by that stage, to me, they are.

I pay no attention to chapter length or word count until the final stage, by the way.  Up until then, it's all about the story and fleshing it out evenly.  That stuff comes later.

I hope that makes sense (and that it answered your question Danielle!).

~ Amanda